Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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