and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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