I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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