Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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