You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
