I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
