but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
