I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize