Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
