The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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