Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
