THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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