belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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