right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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