Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
My vagina is officially offended.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
