Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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