Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
