1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
