You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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