i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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