Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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