this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
