Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Boobs speak an international language.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
