if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
