So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
