i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
