She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize
