So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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