i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
