Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
