He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
