ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
