Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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