He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
