Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Randomize
