white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
