Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
we should paint friendship bongs
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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