we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i just google imaged poop.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
either way he was missing a nipple.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
