I'm drive I can fine osifer
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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