i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
