It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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