I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
the gays at disneyland are vicious
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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