My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
