Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize