That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Randomize
