What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
