I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
