She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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