what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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