What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
